I wrote this poem when I lived in China, after experiencing racism while being mistaken for being a race that I am not. I’m Chinese American (ethnically Chinese born in the US, like my parents, most of my grandparents and some of my great grandparents who were born in the US in the 1800s) and I grew up speaking only English until I learned some Spanish at school. So when I got to China and started learning Chinese, I sounded like any other American trying to learn Chinese. It was obviously not my first language.
I was traveling on a boat when I befriended some Japanese guys and then I asked this Chinese woman if she would please take our picture with my camera. My Chinese was good enough by that point that I knew that she had understood what I had said. She then looked at me, ate another sunflower seed, turned, and walked away. I had long hair at the time, which is not common in China and I was talking to these Japanese guys, so I’m guessing that she thought I was Japanese and because of that, decided not to interact with me. This is a minuscule slight compared to what others have experienced in terms of racism but it left a mark and I wrote a poem. Part of me wanted to explain to her that I was Chinese and not Japanese but most of me felt like, “Why do I need to explain that?”
I hope wherever you are, you can be anti-racist and promote equality. There’s no justification for racism. There’s a way of sharing that involves one person dividing up the portions and then letting the other person decide which portion she wants. Let’s do that. Let’s choose together. Let’s make it safe to be born black.
Would you love me if my skin were purple?
Would you love me if my skin were purple?
Would you?
Would you love me if my skin was purple?
What if it were a light lavender?
What if I had a big green heart stuck on my forehead that wouldn’t wash off with warm water or cold stares?
What if my mother’s father-in-law killed your second cousin’s best friend in a war that people still haven’t forgotten?
What if I were Japanese?
What if I were Chinese?
What if you couldn’t tell the difference?
What if they couldn’t tell the difference?
What if I were from a small mountain village that ate chicken hearts and monkey brains?
What if I wasn’t?
What if I were incredibly good looking?
What if you were blind?
What if I were black?
What if I were remarkably ugly?
What if I were blind?
What if you were black?
What if I wore a cowboy hat, tight jeans and a big belt buckle?
What if I wore a business suit?
What if I wore a business suit that showed my calves?
What if I had bright blue eyes?
What if I had long blonde hair?
What if I were the most beautiful woman you had ever seen?
What if I were from Switzerland?
What if English were my second language and my accent wasn’t quite like yours?
What if I seemed a little slow when I spoke because of this?
What if I really was slow?
What if I had perfect breasts and no friends?
What if I had no friends but perfect breasts?
Would you talk to me?
Would you buy me a drink?
Would you buy me a drink if you knew I was married?
Would you buy me a drink if you knew I would cheat on my husband?
Would you buy me a drink if you knew I would cheat on you?
What do you think about pretty women?
If I burped, would it be sassy?
If I were ugly, would it be rude?!
Who do you think you are?!
Who do you think I am?
Would you love me if you didn’t know who I was?
Will you hate me once you don’t know who I am?